Archive for July 22nd, 2016

Key figures from the Sierra Leone Chess Federation have sent emails stating they want to arrange a match with Bedfordshire in Freetown, their capital as part of their preparation for the upcoming Olympiad. ‘We are no muppets’ -as you English like to say- we recently trounced Timbuktu 14-2 in a televised match so be prepared ‘even though they (Timbuktu) defaulted on 14 boards we would have won anyway’.

‘We’ll put you English gentlemen up at a top hotel; it had running water about 10 years ago, but occasionally we still have electricity. There’s a TV with all locals channels to watch in the lobby, the blood and bullet holes from those slaughtered in the courtyard during the civil war was cleaned up long ago, nothing to see there now. We’ll pay for your flight from Heathrow direct to Freetown via Nairobi, Cape Town, Cairo, Dubai, Ougadouga, Kinshasa, Casablanca, Timbuktu, Algiers, Mogadishu and Tripoli before arriving at Freetown. We hope you can accept the 17 hour stopover in Kinshasa and the 3 day wait in Ougadouga and the one month wait in Tripoli for your visas.

Please be patient and accept that in Africa it is not uncommon to find farmyard animals such as goats on board, we hope this will not spoil your flight in anyway. We shall be requesting another 16-man match but we insist those interested must provide proof of their rating and that they can handle a machine gun, which will be provided upon disembarkation of the aircraft by our great leader who will escort you to your hotel in an armored convoy. We must remind you the machine gun is not for use on your opponent, it is there so when you leave the playing hall you can engage in combat with those who target Westerners with confidence, should this be necesssary.

Our advice is, when you exit the playing hall -to chat about openings as you English like to -do not wander out casually one by one, you must burst out collectively as a team with all guns blazing, that will scare everyone off, only then should you enter into the latest novelties in the Ruy Lopez for example. Hopefully your concentration will not be broken by too much gunfire during the match. The army will be there to help eliminate anyone you may happen to miss.

Those interested may sign up below

download (1)

The Kalashnikov. For those who don’t know that’s 1.e4 c5 2. Nf3 Nc6 3. d4 ed 4. Nxd4 e5. Note that 4. …Nf6 is the Sveshnikov. I’m not sure why but most Sveshinikov players say the Kalashnikov has a major drawback. However for those participating, the Kalashnikov is an appropriate choice.



Scenic area near the playing venue

Read Full Post »